Pondering...

So I don't have a HUGE amount of confidence in myself. I mean, I don't do too badly, but I'm not the most confident person. So every time I get to almost finish all the orders that have been waiting I think ''Surely that's it right? My work can't be good enough, or popular enough to have more people wanting them, surely?'' And every time, without fail, when I get to the end of my wait list, I find another little email from another bereaved mum, requesting something beautiful to honor their baby, or their friend's baby.

While I'm excited to see that yes, people do love what I do, it devastates me to know that there is another mum without her beloved babe, another mum (or dad) experiencing the most devastating grief imagineable.

So now I think, maybe it's not so much that I'm doubting the beauty of my work, but more that I'm desperately hoping that surely there can't be another sad story out there... another parent that can't hold their baby in their arms each day.

Though logic knows that this will NEVER end. That there will always be the presence of this most torturous grief.

In memory of my 3 girls lost in the first 12 weeks of pregnancy.
(Photo by Carly Dudley)

New Start

Soooooooo here's my new blog :) Ain't it pretty?!

 As someone who is naturally the creative sort, I HAVE to have things around me which are beautiful and inspiring. I can't work or create if I'm surrounded in clutter and chaos - I simply cannot create if my surroundings have a negative or crowded energy about them.

It's the simple things that work the best - a little candle quietly burning away on my desk, some flowers from the garden hanging over a basket. A simple jar with bits and pieces of pretty things... all these work together to create a harmonious environment for me to exist in.

I love these roses :) My son suggested to his Daddy that they should pick them out of Nanny and Poppy's garden the other day when they were visiting. They have the most amazing rose garden, and the smell coming from these flowers while I work is just divine :) A very special little addition to my space.

A while ago Carly blogged about a Memory Board (or Inspiration or Dream Board - whichever you prefer). She and a couple of other girls had been at my place that morning and Carls had seen the canvas leaning against my wall with a collection of pretty (but very basic) things on it. I think at that stage I had a few butterflies, couple of photos, a piece of torn fabric... it was only a couple of days old and was rather basic. Since then, it has grown so much :) It now includes some sweet things my 4 year old made at school for me for mothers day, a Tag that I'd made, a Tag that my son had decorated, cards which customers had written to me. It's beautiful and much more varied than I anticipated it would be. I love it :) I often peg a fresh flower to it as well, and take it down when it's wilted. Having flowers and greenery and life around has a wonderful effect on the soul.

My Inspiration Board

Small butterfly Tag (comes in an organza bag with 5 butterflies for $3.00)

Wishing you all a beautiful peaceful day xxx

Evening at the beach

So I haven't blogged in a while, I've had some family stuff going on so have been preoccupied. Feeling better now though and thought I'd share a little from last night.

I took my sweet little dude up to the beach where Carly writes the children's names. He and I don't get a lot of time alone together anymore since having my girl 10 months ago. It was so beautiful up there, pretty chilly but Jordan didn't seem to notice - he had a blast jumping through the the water that pooled on the shore :)

Here's a selection of photos that I took from last night of my gorgeous boy and that amazing beach :)
xx